Being Liturgist

I do not know the actual statistics but I know that more people would rather observe their own funeral than stand up somewhere and speak. In the top ten list of fears, public speaking always comes out as number one.

It's not my number one fear, but it's up there. So that's why I can confess to a little nervousness about beginning my month-long stint as liturgist in my church.

I rotate with Jay, Joe, John, and Matt. They all do an awesome job and regardless of which one I follow, I have that deep fear that the congregation is going to be disappointed.

When my minister asked me to join the rotation, I (for a moment) thought he might be confusing me with someone else, then I thought he might be kidding. I have finally figured out that he is amazing with figuring out what the church needs and also helping with individual growth.

When I say, "I am not worthy." He says, "No, you're not. Do it anyway."

In less than 24 hours, I will be liturgist. I will do it this month and several others next year. I have written my prayers, read my bible passages and certainly prayed for guidance.

Hypocrisy? Sometimes. Always. I know I sin. I suspect you do too. I suspect the clergy I adore and respect (current & former) do too. I love the story about the man wagging his finger at a church-going man with "Why would I go to church? It's filled with hypocrites!" And the answer is, "Isn't that the best place for us?"


What gets me through it is this. I am not public speaking. I am doing a public service for my Lord.

(This sounds so holier than thou and I don't know how to fix it!) Please muddle through and see the bigger message: Be involved! Join a house of worship!

Thrilling

Anyone with half a brain is now supposed to be completely appalled and sick of the overwhelming attention to the sudden death of Michael Jackson, aka Wacko Jacko. If you're a baby boomer or older, you've lost a few music icons ... Elvis, John Lennon, and more.

Yes, we (as a society, as a star-obsessed culture) have forgotten that the Supreme Court has a full docket ahead of them in October. The transformation of health care is going to kill us or make us stronger. Our new president has a task more overwhelming than most people care to calculate. We're still at war. The planet is possibly freezing or boiling at any given point and 99.9 percent of us who would really like to find a reasonably good fit for a reasonably good job still have not found it.

Is the untimely death of Michael Jackson worth the diversion?

Oh, probably not.

If you had asked me two weeks ago if I was a fan of his, I probably would've shrugged and said, "He's ok. I like some of his music." I would've probably added that his fascination with remaking his face gives me the creeps and the endless accusations and out-of-court settlements give me pause.

But a funny thing happened while I watched glimpses of the endless coverage of the past couple of weeks -- I was shocked at how much his music has been a part of my life. From buying a 45 record of "ABC" by The Jackson Five to associating certain songs with high school and college. The first music video I was ever interested in watching was "Thriller." I watched it again (the long version) the other day.

Of course I watched the funeral. I was touched once again by his music and by his legacy. Turns out, I'm a much bigger fan than I thought.

Don't Look Ethel!

Appropriate is a lovely word. It rolls off the tongue easily. It sits nicely in the gut or the soul until someone or something nudges: "Made you look!"

Like the truth, appropriate is self defined. For all our sakes, I'll err with brevity.

I am truly bone tired of the following:

Doing a visual inspection of anyone's tattoos.

Diverting my eyes and struggling to understand a conversation because a tongue implement has now become a speech impediment.

Guessing the circumference of any upper thigh area that I should not have to see.

Wondering why anyone would be so disrespectful to wear that (fill in the blank) to church, a funeral, a job interview, a dinner party, or anywhere in public.

I am a great fan of, "To each his own." Do it, live it, celebrate it.


Everything has its place. You can have it. Please don't make me look at it.