Mom's Day

Mother's Day is bittersweet for me. I love my mother, my best friend, with all my heart. But I didn't get to birth children of my own and that is one of my true regrets in life.

Yet, God opens doors. He gave me Jennifer and Tyler -- two of my greatest blessings. He gave me their mothers, two of my best friends. He gave me goddaughters (thank you Jan!) and a bounty of children to love. My "sister" has three children and thankfully, she has commanded that they love me.

You never stop being a mother. Today I was liturgist in my church and I flubbed a portion of the responsive reading. There's nothing like looking into the congregation and seeing your mother say, "You messed it up."

Yes, I did. And thanks Mom. One of your most amazing gifts is to let me know that I mess up and you love me anyway.

I truly believe it takes a village to raise a child. This child is looking at 50, a scant few years away, and realizing the women who shaped me, scolded me, loved me and soothed me.

Here's the prayer I shared with the congregation this morning:

Gracious God,

Today we honor mothers. We thank you for the mothers who gave birth to us and step mothers who stepped up. Thank you for adoptive mothers who grew children in their hears. Thank you for foster mothers who deal with situations most of us couldn't imagine. We thank you for grandmothers who get to love and laugh and send the children home.

Lord, let us also honor aunts and godmothers and all who touch our children. Thank you for neighborhood mothers who instinctively know it takes a village.

Let us also be grateful for Mary, a young mother in a challenging situation, who gave birth to our Lord.
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May your loving hand touch all mothers everywhere.

So, I hope you honor yourself today. If you birthed a child, participated in raising a child, smacked a child upside the head for doing something dangerous or stupid... you have added to the community of humanity for all the greater good.

And may you all have someone who can look at you with a wink and a smile and say, "You messed up." Yes Mom, we all do it once in a while.

Sunday School

With a nod and a thank you to my friend Jay Flora, I will tell you something he said in Sunday School this morning.

"I used to get up a little early to attend Sunday School, but I was really there for the worship service. Now, I get up early to go to Sunday School and I hang around for the worship service."

My apologies to Jay for the paraphrasing.
My parents dragged me, kicking and screaming, to Sunday School. Really? Don't I do enough? Don't I volunteer for every event? Don't I show up for most of the big stuff?
I went to my parents' Sunday School class and it was wonderful for a while. Then I sought out my own. My own age group, a different agenda, a different conversation.
I love my minister and I love worship. But like Jay, I embrace the intimacies of Sunday School. I think we really helped Karen and Terry last week (thanks to Lori) and I think we collectively hold each others hands and hearts.
Sunday School means I came for worship but right now, in this group, I'm here for you.

Cubicles

Is there anything worse than being assigned to a cubicle each day? Well, of course disasters like tornadoes, tsunamis and other freaks of nature come to mind. But in the day to day working world of us little worker bees, I think cubicles are the worst.

When I was a young worker at AFNB (about to become Bank One) I had a little office appropriate to my little job. When they were building the Bank One Tower (now the Chase Tower) I was shown the plan of seniority and cubicle size. I did not rank an office but I did get a rather large cubicle with a great view. I also managed a parking space in the underground garage which meant I could go from garage to garage without messing up my hair.

As I grew with the company and my beloved boss retired, I got his office. With a door. With a conference table. With art that inspired me.

A little less than a year ago, I took a wonderful job with a company who's mission I firmly believe in. As the little troll on the totem poll, I was assigned a cubicle. I (being me) decorated it. I put out a candy jar (which almost broke me) in a way to say, "Stop by. Get to know me. Help yourself."

I put great faith in one man (my boss) and he put great faith in me.

I now have a great office with a door that locks and two windows that let in the sunshine. I have no idea why that is important to me but it is. The only thing that I miss about Bank One is the bank plane. Since we're a small, not -for-profit credit union, I think I will continue to fly commercial.

Here's my advice for all business owners and managers out there. If you really want to stifle creativity and productivity:

Put them all in a cubicle
Make them clock in & out and account for every second of every day.

Easter Prayers

I pray a lot. I think everyone does. Even people who have no faith seem to call upon a higher being in certain times. I, boastfully, like knowing who I am talking to. (Sin #1 right there -- being boastfful.)

I have never made the connection with the Easter Bunny, the egg hunt, etc. That doesn't mean I haven't participated. I just don't get it. Of course, we did the Santa thing with young children while also recognizing the meaning of the season.

It's frustrating when God answers your prayers and the answer is no. I prayed like crazy for a couple of friends with cancer and yet, God decided to bring them home. Sometimes you've go to accept that God's plan differs from your plan.

But Easter represents new life and new beginnings. So with that in mind, I give you some Easter prayers:

Peace in households, peace in neighborhoods, peace in countries
Harmless animals who find welcoming homes
Children in need who receive help
Jobless people who find jobs
Badly dressed people who get a clue

Ok, I threw that last one in there to make you smile. Happy Easter to all.

The Fur Coat Story

A couple of years after I graduated from college, I went to a tailgate party. One of my college guy friends brought a date and she was wearing jeans, decked-out jewelry and a fur coat.

Those were the days before Facebook but trust me, I friended her immediately. Hell, I wanted to be her.

When Dan was the person I wanted to get to know, I borrowed her coat and did the parade lap at Friday's.

Before Dan and I married, he bought me a fur. Later, we were at some benefit and somehow I ended up with another. (Think lots of wine) I bought a mink stole at some antique shop and a girlfriend told me to put it away until I was over 40. I'm well over 40 and I've worn it a couple of times.

When the Captain and the Belle lived with us (my in-laws) she brought a couple of furs and I actually bought her one on a trip to Phoenix. I have since inherited her furs.

This is all to say that no one wears furs anymore and I have a closet full.

I occasionally wear one to the country club -- one of the few places I feel certain no one will throw blood or mustard on me. I wore one to my grandfather's funeral but in reflection I think I did that to make a statement -- "You may have tried to ignore my father but here we are!"

I had a call yesterday reminding me to have them cleaned and put in storage. ($$$$) I will do it. But, I will probably not redeem all that I put on deposit.

With a Full Heart

I am reading Katie Couric's book, which is a compilation of great advice from amazing people. Love her or hate her, she has tenacity and spunk. She has survived a great deal and seems to do it with an attitude of gratitude.

The book opens with a little story about her late husband who used to tell her that she must have been born on a sunny day. She calls it her greatest compliment -- the ability to see the glass half full, to find the silver lining -- fill in your cliche here.

Today I attended Palm Sunday service. I hugged people that I am blessed to hug pretty much every Sunday. Yesterday, I saw my friend come home from the hospital and she is doing well. Tomorrow, I go to a job that I waited a long time to come to fruition and I find I love it more every day.

A big dog welcomed me home with a big jump (Paws on the ground!) and a sloppy kiss. Lots of people claim to love me but no one shows me the love quite as demonstratively as Gabby.

I will put my palm above my doorway as a sign of Christian welcome. I will greet all who enter with that same spirit in my heart. And I will thank God for days like today when I am sure that I was born on a sunny day.

The Stupid Pill

I read a great line in a novel I was reading lately.

"When did you take the stupid pill and how quickly does it wear off?"

As someone who has taken a number of stupid pills in her life, I immediately identified. I am also guilty of looking at and listening to someone while judging them completely and totally addicted to stupid pills.

We all do stupid things. Some are harmless. Others wreck our marriages, our children, our finances, our trust in others and their ability to trust us.

I was recently looking at some photos on Facebook of people I love dearly. I saw a crazy amount of cleavage and beer bottles. I saw young people who will one day be looking for a job and these photos will come back to haunt them. I saw people I love who took the stupid pill.