The Help

Have you read this? I read it a while ago and recently reread it. I can't explain it but it touches me.

I have southern roots. Lots of them sprout in Knoxville, Tennessee but I also have an adopted love for Mississippi and the family of my in-laws.

There is a graciousness that goes with the South. There are also a lot of secrets and terribly dark days of prejudice and violence.

Whenever I spend two minutes with any of my southern cousins, I immediately begin to speak with a southern accent. I can't explain it.

Can you imagine asking your "help" to use the bathroom outside? That's just a little glimpse into this book and the issues it raises.

If you haven't read this book, I highly recommend it. I read an article last week and the author said the book was rejected more than 40 times. I applaud her for rewriting and resubmitting a b'jillion times. Now, it's also been sold to Hollywood and a movie will be coming out in August. I hope the movie is as good as the book.

If you've read the book or see the movie, let me know what you think.

Bubble Wrap

Today I was waiting for a friend in Broad Ripple, a little village in the heart of our town. A parent left the stroller on the sidewalk and I noticed the label said, "Remove Child Before Folding."

Have we really come to that?

A couple of years ago, I was on a plane and they announced on the speaker that they would not be serving peanuts because a child on the flight had peanut allergies. They also asked that anyone not eat anything with peanuts during the flight.

Bad things happen.

A person who was scheduled to review photos with our parishioners was called away this week because his son was murdered for his pizza delivery money. Not too far from my neighborhood, a guy was walking his dog and ended up shot in the back, paralyzed from the waist down. This was for $20 and his cell phone which he gave up with no questions asked.

Fear is a fungus. Freaky accidents and violent crimes get the most attention because they are the most shocking and the most unusual. Yet, we all go crazy.

I know someone who wears a pistol strapped to her ankle at all times. In her daily errands and in her own home. It's terribly sad for me to think of her living in perpetual fear.

I know a couple of people from my childhood. They both have three children roughly the same age. For the record, I love all the people involved in this story. But to be honest, I am less nervous with the kids who are allowed to cross the street, crawl in my car, roll with my dog, etc. The other kids are delightful and I'm sure they have their own releases. From my limited view, I see the bubble-wrapped, "don't touch the dog" and "take your shoes off" kind of childhood. Even when my own parents tried to keep me safe, I flocked to my peers and their houses where children fell down, picked themselves up and moved on.

I worked downtown before our downtown was revitalized. For many years I walked 5 blocks to and from my parking spot. Gasp! I was unarmed. I used to beg to walk to school and occasionally my parents let me do it.

Here's what I believe and the statistics prove me out.

A child is more likely to be kidnapped by a non-custodial parent than a stranger.
A child is more likely to be molested by a family member than a stranger.
A woman is more likely to be raped by an acquaintance than a stranger.
Anyone is more likely to be killed by someone texting while driving than all of the above scenarios.

Most people are good. They will call 911 if something seems amiss. They will administer CPR or the Heimlich maneuver instead of stealing your wallet. They will risk their own lives to save yours.

In the 70s, a very young John Travolta starred in a movie, "The Boy in the Bubble."

I refuse to be the woman in the bubble.

Abuse

While I was out of town last week, I started receiving a series of unsettling emails. The instruction was to Google a person's name to get the full details. (If I seem a little vague here, bear with me.) I know and trust the people who were feeding this information and I recognized the name they told me to Google.

This is a true story about abuse, written by someone who does not know all the facts. I know enough.

A man comes home. He has had too much to drink. He is an egomaniac and one of those insufferable men with a God complex. He has probably let his semi-celebrity status fuel his narcissistic tendencies. He and his wife argue.

Like me, she is probably no shrinking violet.

The anger escalates. The threats begin. Of course, an innocent animal is involved.

The official press version from his attorney is "He decided to clean his gun and it accidentally fired."

He shot the dog in the leg and as his wife cradled the poor animal in an attempt to protect it, the bullet went through the dog's leg and along her head.




Her eardrum was blown. She was in the hospital for several days and is now recovering from surgery. The dog also required immediate care.



There is so much abuse in this story I can barely handle it. But let me be up front about this much. This is not an unbiased opinion. This is not an attempt to be fair. This type of story or a similar one is played out every day in every city across this country.

No, I can't be unbiased in telling you this story for one reason.

The woman in this story is my cousin.